- To never have to work retail again
- To own 5 dogs, big fluffy ones
- To live in the woods, in a cozy little cabins
- To have a room where 2 walls have floor to ceiling windows and the other two have floor to ceiling bookshelves. Full of books. Duh.
- To punch a Nazi in the face
- To never have to get up before sunrise to go to a shitty deadend job
- To brawl in a Waffle House parking lot once before I die
Nothing pisses me off more than people who come to my work and are the rudest people imaginable. Nothing.
If I am trying to do my job and I’m in the way, there is a simple fucking phrase for that: Excuse me. Learn to use it. Because all you people that show up to a store and forget basic fucking manners, fuck you.
And fuck your parents, too, for raising a completely useless waste of space.
And if you’re a parent and you are treating people like this in front of your kids, fuck you. Because you are raising a kid now that will perpetuate the issue with the service industry of people being treated as less than because they are providing you with a service that you think is below you.
When you come in as a customer and yell at a minimum-wage employee for no reason other than you can and you feel that you are the Customer Who Is Always Right, you make me want to shove me boot up your ass and slap some sense into you.
When you come in and yell at my co-workers who are working their first jobs and are sweet kids who haven’t had to deal with your shit 24/7 for the last six years, I want to ban you from my place of business and tell you to go grow your own groceries in your compost-laden brain hole. Because they don’t deserve you disrupting their day and making them feel like shit over shit they can’t control.
And one of these days, I’m going to disregard my priorities and go OFF. Just you wait.
For those of you who want to know a little about me, I figured I would write down some basics for all of you out there to imagine about me while you think of your dream girl as you lie in bed, waiting to fall asleep.
I love dogs. A lot. More than people. I would kill a man just to pet a dog.
I love coffee. I once threatened an ex who wanted to go camping with me. I told him that I would castrate him if he spoke to me before I had coffee. I was not joking. He thought I was.
I am not here to make money. I am here to vent all my bullshit in a way that won’t ruin my personal relationships.
I am a great cook.
I make the best jokes. Will I ever tell them? Probably not. But they’re pretty damn good.
I am utterly bitter and horrible. Like a cup of black coffee, but while you may think it’s still warm enough to drink its actually room temperature and leaves a bad taste in your mouth because you were expecting hot and delicious not cold and disappointing.
In summary, I am cold, bitter, and disappointing. However, some people like this.
You know what’s absolutely ridiculous? Hustle culture.
The idea that you can get ahead by working super hard on multiple ventures now so that when you’re 40 or 50 years old you can retire early with all your money you earned.
It’s the corporate bullshit to get you to spend all your time and energy funneling your focus into side-gigs and investment opportunities on the off-chance you’ll get lucky and actually make money off it.
Are there blogs and forums and vlogs all devoted to how this person made this much with side hustles? Sure. Are they lying? Probably not.
Did they sacrifice a hell of a lot to get there? Damn straight.
Was it worth it? Probably not really.
Nothing is worth sacrificing your family and friends and time and energy and youth so you can make a quick buck. Nothing is worth sacrificing your health just to make an extra $100 a week to make rent.
Not to mention that the market has become so saturated for the sidegig market that any other lucky breaks are few and far between now. While all these other people are somehow miraculously making it with their sidegig and blog and vlog and etsy store, many others will not because they have the same skills as everyone else and cannot make it in a market already overflowing with suppliers.
I won’t sacrifice my health just to make an extra $20 a week. I might sell a kidney or my liver, but I sure as hell won’t lose any sleep just so I can work 18 hours a day. Fuck that.
I’m so fucking tired of this positivity craze going on.
I’m sure that having these mindsets are backed by science and shit but…
It can’t be healthy to be happy all the time. Sometimes you hurt and you wanna cry and you’re mad, but trying to smile through the pain is like trying to ignore a broken ankle.
I don’t see how being happy all the time is good for your health and well being if all you’re doing is ignoring the bad shit to keep on smiling.
Sure, those fancy herbal teas and sunlight and self-care bullshit is good for you (it’s basic fucking healthcare to stay hydrated, clean, fed, and given fresh air and sun), but doing those things instead of seeking help for your issues or just giving yourself the time to process the bad is a bullshit mentality.
You can’t go through life living only in the light. You have to live through some of the dark, too.
But then again, with how fucked up the world is, why are we going to put on those positivity blinders to try to diminish the way the world is floundering? We should be as angry and negative and bitter as the people who wrecked the world and give them a taste of their own medicine that they’ve been handing down for years to all the post-millennial/gen-z kids.
And I’m sure someone is going to lose their minds over this, and try to justify it to me, but guess what? I don’t care. I wouldn’t be where I am without my bitter, angry ass and I’m sure you can think of a time or two where you didn’t just smile and nod through it.
We are going to dive right in with this blog. So say hello to the first post and buckle your seatbelts ’cause this is going to be a bumpy af ride.
I work retail. At one of the biggest retailers in the world.
And it is literal hell on earth.
Not only are the people I work with the literal rudest, most childish people, but nine times out of ten, the customers are the rudest, most stuck-up people you will ever meet.
And I get it; maybe you had a long day at work and now you have to go buy groceries cause your spouse didn’t and your kids are screaming and driving you up the wall.
But don’t take it out on me, the person who is literally trying to do my job and help you get your shit and go.
Now taking the people out of the equation, the work environment is shit. The hours are shit. Management is shit. The pay is SHIT.
Now, why am I working here if it is so damn shitty? Why don’t I just go get a new job or go to school?
Because I am in school. I have bills to pay in the mean time while I look for a better job. I cannot afford to live without a paycheck like some people.
So even though I am working at Hell, Inc., I still have bills to pay and mouths to feed. But goddamn am I the fucking Queen of this bullshit.