Tag Archives: Hell

Gripes and Groans, student life

Student life: when you don’t add up compared to your peers…

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So you just got into college and you’re a fresh-faced freshman, ready to take on the world.

Until you hit midterms and you fail miserably, while everyone else is acing it. And you thought you were good at math or English, or whatever it is.

So now what do you do? You’ve hit a snag in your plan and you honestly feel like shit. You were supposed to be good at school. You thought you were good at school. At least good enough to get into college. So what are you doing wrong?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

While you may not have access to all the resources available, just remember, you got into school and you got into school on your own hard work (hopefully).

So am I telling you to just buckle down and get to work?

Kind of.

I know what you’re thinking right now. You’re stuck comparing yourself to everyone because you thought you were good enough but all these other kids seem to be better than you. You’re stuck thinking how can you compare to Tiffany with a 4.0 GPA and boyfriend on the debate team and she’s part of a prestigious sorority.

Those braggers and put-togethers are like your rival in a Pokemon game. They have just enough to be a tough opponent to to challenge you, so you have to get crafty and wise up to the moves they’re going to use.

So if you know that Tiffany in your Lit class only works 10 hours a week at her club, then make her do more work in the group project because she has time to spare. You do not.

So if you know John in your Calc class is a math major, ask him for help and just smile and nod when he gets all high-and-mighty. Because he already knows everything and you can use that resource for free.

If you know that the TA in your lab is majoring in this exact field, then go to office hours or see if they’re available via email, at the least, to answer questions of the lab.

So what I’m really saying is start grinding and getting crafty with your resources. Pretend you’re a spy thrown into this life and you have to seamlessly integrate to keep your cover from being blown. Just start working harder than they are because damn, one day they are going to slip and it is going to be a spectacular fall.

And when then see you at the top, already covered in mud from fighting your way up this mountain, they’ll know, and you’ll know, that you were always more worthy and more qualified than they ever were.

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Witchcraft: altars and sacred spaces…

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Do you need an altar? Why would you need an altar? What is an altar? So-and-so said I need one? What do I even put on an altar? What do you mean I need to dedicate my altar? What does that even mean? How do I-

Take a deep breath. Good? Okay, here’s the dirty truth of altars…

They’re completely optional and really only necessary if you decide to pursue paganism and/or Wicca in addition to witchcraft.

So why are altars pushed for so hard in the community? Well, many witches are practicing pagans or Wiccans. So for them, an altar is completely practical. But what about those that aren’t pagan or follow more mainstream religions or have no gods?

Well, that’s the cool part about witchcraft. If you want to make an altar, go for it. Make it in your dining room, in a sunny corner of your office, or your bedroom closet. Hell, there’s a shit ton of ideas on Pinterest for shoe box and mint tin altars.

So what’s the purpose of an altar?

For those who practice in accordance to the old religions or in correlation to deities, an altar is a sacred space to honor those deities and spirits. For many of the old religions, there are no longer any physical sacred spaces, like churches, for people to worship at, so many create small scared spaces for their own private practice. Cultures across teh world have kept shrines and altars in their homes for their gods; Ancient Greeks, Romans, Chinese, and Japanese families kept shrines to various gods in their houses and pertaining to their professions (i.e. gods devoted to harvest for farmers. and gods devoted to fair seas for fishermen).

So what about if you follow mainstream religions or have no religion?

For those following more monotheistic religions (Judaism, Christianity, Islam, etc), there’s no rules against having a shrine to your god in your house is there? Many people have things already, like crucifixes, or holy texts. An altar in your house could just be a safe and honored space to store your holy texts or to meditate.

And for those of us who are not dedicated to a god or religion, well, an altar is just optional really.

Do I have an altar?

Not really. But I do have a space reserved just for my witchy needs in my office. I can push it back into the closet and out of sight if my in-laws decide to drop by unannounced (like they always do). I don’t consider it an altar or a sacred space, but I do consider it a reserved area.

Like, that area is only for witchy supplies and storing my cards and journals and incense (no crystals yet).

What tips do I have for little newbies to set up their own altar/sacred space/witchy corner?

Once again, as with all witchcraft, first make sure this space has the intention of being your corner, your altar, your sacred space. If you’re closeted and setting up in a shoe box or in the closet itself (lol cause you’re in the closet already, get it?), then reserve that space just for that. Meaning, your shoebox holds nothing but your witchcraft supplies, your deitiy dedication, your Book of Shadows/ Grimoire. Don’t use your space for anything but your craft and worship.

Now, I understand working and living in a small space so maybe some area has to be multipurpose. So maybe make your altar travel-sized or easily collapsible if it’s in the spare room so you can pull out the Murphy bed for guests staying the night, or make it easy to move if floor space is limited, like in a dorm room.

What are things I have on my sacred space?

For me personally, I have just a little space on the top of a steamer trunk/coffee table in my office. I use it to hold my incense, journal, and Tarot cards. I also use the space as a writing table to write here, do school work, and meditate. But the corner remains as only used for witchcraft. The rest of the tabletop I cleanse with smoke to create a space when I do large readings (or with a Lysol wipe if my cats have decided to walk all over it).

Now, I understand multipurpose, so when I do need to get into the trunk itself (I keep blankets in there for easy access), I store all my stuff in a basket and slide it into the closet.

All my herbs stay in a kitchen cabinet, because the last thing I want to explain to my mother-in-law is why I have black pepper and basil leaves just hanging out in my office. There’s just no way to explain that away, considering the kitchen is a good 4 doors down from the office.

What if I am practicing paganism/Wicca/religion?

Then start looking at Pinterest my friend! There are so many ideas and absolutely gorgeous pictures of other witch’s altars and how they dedicate their altars. There are so many ideas of how to fit an altar into a shoebox or how to dedicate to your deities or how to even just construct a space that fits with your preferred style, like minimalism or traditional (read: hoarder-style old timey) witchy.

There’s no wrong way to do an altar. Just so long as it works for you and you feel like it’s a space where you can meditate, grow and worship as needed.

Gripes and Groans

Working retail: retail vs the real world…

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Working in retail is like working in a whole different world.

It’s a world of perpetual smiling, nodding, and degrading yourself for the customer.

It’s a world where ‘professional’ is thrown around like salt on fries.

There’s nothing professional about it, honestly. How is it professional to ask children to show up and then refuse to tell them the rules of professionalism, subjecting them to a trial by fire?

How is it professional to ask that only certain employees can dress for the environmental conditions, while asking more who deal with those same conditions to wear other clothing?

How is it professional to allow dating within the company, but only until one party of the couple is promoted from their own hard work and dedication?

How is it professional to allow some employees to bend all the rules but some still have to follow them to the tee for no reason other than the managers have an attitude problem?

I worked in the real world. I worked in an office where I was required to be professional. I was required to wear a certain dress code and act a certain way based off my position. I understood that going into that job. I understood that I couldn’t wear certain clothes or talk in a more casual way and I knew that I was getting paid to act that way.

In retail, not only are you not paid enough to really care how you act but, with how stressful it is dealing with not only your customers, but fellow employees, people wonder why there are some many stories revolving some of the biggest retailers in the world.

I can’t comprehend how consumers still choose to shop at these places that are obviously horrible to work, let alone shop.

My own parents continue to shop at a retailer where not long ago, people experienced domestic terrorism and died from gun violence. My parents weren’t apart of the tragedy, but they still choose to shop at the place where things like that happen.

Maybe what I’m trying to convey is that as consumers, we can end this cycle of high school drop outs being underpaid and underappreciated, just by taking our business elsewhere. We can end this cycle of poverty where the CEOs of the big retailers take so much of the profits and the low-level employees struggling to make ends meet between 2-3 jobs by refusing to give these people any more of our money.

And I’m sure some of you are thinking, but don’t you work at one of those places? Won’t you be affected by them losing business?

Sure I will, for a little bit. But I can always find a new job better serving my community and existing outside of the drama and hysteria that is retail work. Or I’ll die from homelessness after 6 months without a job. But either way, I win in the short term.

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Witchcraft: moon phases…

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Oh the moon. Probably the most popular celestial body. (unlike the sun, which can’t catch a damn break). She controls the seas, protects us from asteroids, and illuminates the nights. What would we do without the moon?

For witches in almost every domain of practice, the moon is a sacred body and we do our best to honor her. So the phases of the moon are a big deal. But for little beginner witchlings, like myself, diving into the use and worship of the moon is daunting. There’s just so MUCH.

So where do you even begin?

The easiest thing to understand about the moon is the phases.

You know what the moon phases are. We’ve all grown up watching the moon transition like clockwork; waxing, full, waning, new. We’ve all stayed up late on summer nights and seen the full moon illuminate the landscape.

So breaking down the moon phases is an easy enough task.

New moons are when the moon is turned away from us (you all know your science class lectures about how the moon reflects the sun, blah, blah, blah.)

Waxing is the moon growing from new into full.

Full moon is self-explanatory.

Waning is the moon transition from full to new.

In witchcraft, we attribute the moon phases to not only the 3, but to certain times.

The major phases of the moon coincide with the Maiden, Mother, Crone. In witchcraft, this woman/women are the representation of the witch and the witch’s journey. Waxing crescent is the Maiden, Full is Mother, and Waning crescent is the Crone.

The phases of the moon coincide with timing as well.

The new moon is used as a time for beginning spells revolving around new projects, as well as focusing on the self and recouping your own strength and energy.

The waxing moon is for attraction spells, usually money or love spells. The waxing moon is used for attraction because the moon itself is getting bigger and bigger and more. Therefore, attracting.

The full moon is the prime time for witches. Not only does each full coincide with something pertaining to the month it occurs in (Corn moon for August, e.g.) but the full moon itself is a revered as being as much of a power source as the sun. Full moons can be used for charging decks and crystals (especially those sensitive to extended sunlight), as well as making moon water, an energy charged water used for most everything in witchcraft from light cleansings, to even making tea or bath water. The Full moon is used for so much in the craft, including cleansing yourself and restoring your own energy. (moonbathing anyone? You know, instead of sunbathing?)

The waning moon is used for banishing. It’s the opposite of the waxing moon. As the moon shrinks, it is losing. Therefore, banishing.

No matter what the moon is doing, you can always sit and meditate under her light. The moon is as steady as the sun and is a great place to jump into witchcraft if you’re already lost.

And the best part about the moon and her energy? You don’t even need an actual spell to just sit and appreciate her beauty and energy. You can just sit and relax, meditate, and enjoy the gentle, loving light.

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Witchcraft: intention…

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Intention is everything. No matter what you start in witchcraft, you read ‘intention this’ and ‘intention that’ or even just ‘setting intention’.

What is intention?

It’s exactly like what it sounds like.

Intention, or intent, is what you want the spell to do for you. Each spell requires an intention to work. It’s like the battery for a toy. If you don’t put the right battery into the toy, it won’t work.

So how do you set intention? Well, that’s the hard part sometimes.

You have to know exactly what you want when you set an intention. If you’re working a spell for say, attracting money, then you have to be clear with what you want.

But this doesn’t answer the question, of what intention is. I know when I first starting diving in, every time intention came up in a spell, I would scratch my head and wonder what they were talking about.

From what I can gleam, intention is the energy you put into the spell itself. Of course, some spells need other energy to work, like celestial lighting or fire. But you have to put your own energy into the spell so that the universe knows who’s putting that energy out there.

So intention is just basically the energy you assign to a spell to make it work.

How do you actually set intention?

Depending on the spell, it’s easy enough to set intention. Most spells have incantations to set the intention (or the incantation is the spell itself).

Other times, when you cast the circle (which I’ll get to in a later post), you meditate and cast the energy from yourself for the spell. Which is the hard part. Because you really have to focus

Why is intention so important for witchcraft?

Intention is important because it’s the force behind an action. If you’ve taken a mindfulness course or have even just heard about mindfulness (the new craze), then you’ve heard about how just acting a certain way and putting certain thoughts into those actions can help you be more productive, more capable at handling stress, etc.

Witchcraft is the exact same thing as mindfulness but with a little more oomph behind it. Mindfulness itself has only been around for a couple years now, but witchcraft is eons old. Witchcraft intention is setting your thoughts and emotions on one track and using that energy to drive a reaction.

So how does the intention in a spell work?

Remember how I said intention is like the battery of a spell? The intention is the direction you move the spell. It’s the battery that moves the spell along.

And I can hear you, just like I myself said not long ago “that doesn’t make any sense! how does intention work! Like work-work!”

So hears the breakdown. Imagine that the spell is a train. The destination is the reason for the spell. For this example lets use a common money spell to attract wealth. The train is set towards Wealth. But the train can’t move down the track without fuel. Your intentions are the coal for the train to move (or steam or gas or whatever). You meditate on the feeling on wanting wealth, of attracting wealth, of being wealthy. You figuratively put that emotion on the train. The train now has fuel for the journey down the track. So how do you get the train moving? You do something like charge the spell with something else, like crystals or fire. Those are the engine to process the intention-fuel. Now the train can move down the track and take you to Wealth.

I know this is confusing and a strange topic. Believe me. As much as I love science, physics is not my forte and intention is reminiscent of physics. Just because you cannot see or measure the force, the force is still present. Like gravity. You may not have tools readily available to measure the force of gravity, but gravity is still a force acting on you, whether or not you can see or measure it. Same thing goes for intentions.

Just because you can’t see or actively feel the energy in intentions, doesn’t mean it isn’t there.

Gripes and Groans, student life

Student life: what they don’t tell you about college classes..

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College is a fantastic time. It’s a great time to learn about the world and your self and your place in the world. But lately, more and more kids are heading into college and struggling through their first year(s).

Why is that?

In my opinion, from what I’ve observed being a college student, and being asked questions by kids at work (I have teenagers on my team who want to know everything about college), college is set up to fail a vast majority of incoming students.

What is the disconnect between what kids are told by their high school teachers and what actually happens at college?

For one, most classes are actually self taught. I know, I know… You’re paying thousands and thousands just to be there, plus the hundreds on textbooks, so that means the professor should show you something right?

No. The professor is just there to make sure you get evaluated for the class. The actual learning part is up to you. You need to actually do the ‘optional’ reading and do every activity. The lecture is just to see what the professor will test you on. No actual learning happens in a lecture. It happens in your dorm room at 3am as you struggle through the same chapter for the 10th time trying to memorize the equation for cellular respiration.

Another thing kids don’t get told about is how to effectively time manage. Every kid thinks they know how to manage their time and those who took extracurriculars in high school are extremely sure about their ability to time manage.

What nobody wants to tell them is that, real time management involves prioritizing tasks and pushing some tasks off until last minute because more important tasks come up.

For example, knowing that a big project is due, these freshies will spend hours trying to finish a 10 point homework assignment instead of plotting out and researching for the project that’s due in two days.

Just because something is due immediately doesn’t mean you absolutely have to complete it if it’s going to put your grade in jeopardy for another course.

Honestly, there is so much they don’t tell you about college when you’re a high school junior or senior.

And even with all the advice out there from kids like me who have just finished college, or are still in the middle of it… There’s still so much nobody tells you.

Like, syllabuses will save your ass time and time again, so don’t lose them or throw them out after the first class.

Or stock up on tissues and cold medicine before cold season hits, especially if you live in the dorms, because you will catch something.

Pick one day a week to always do laundry otherwise you will run out of clean underwear and usually before a big event (date, job interview, family dinner).

Write notes in class in pen because a pen will 9 times out of 10 work more consistently than a pencil.

Do not make in class notes pretty. You will spend too much time switching between highlighters and then lose information that will definitely be on the test.

Do not wear impractical shoes or clothing, no matter how cute you think you look. Those heels will be your bane when you have to walk all the way across campus in the sudden rainstorm.

Do not party. Just don’t. Not only are the legal implications shitty (wait until you have to pay your first ticket), but if you party with strangers, bad shit happens. Maybe not to you or your friends, but bad shit happens.

Always carry a charger and a snack. Always. There will be days you get stuck in class and miss lunch or dinner.

Set alarms and reminders on your phone for everything. Everything, from taking out the trash to a project due next week to reminding yourself to take a break from studying so you can actually make it to the dining hall for food.

When you move out of the dorms, you will trash your new place at least once in the semester. And not party-trash. I mean, working 30 hours, projects galore, haven’t done the dishes in weeks trashed.

You will get at least one shitty professor. One who makes you hate that class and their department. Suck up dealing with them because honestly, they can and will fail you for a shitty attitude. Happened to me. But that’s a story for another time.

No amount of words I put out will actually make your experience any different.

Lay off the coffee shop lattes because you will inevitably go broke. Trust me.

Coffee and energy drinks are not meal replacements.

Most assignments are listed only in the syllabus and it’s your responsibility to know what is die when. These assignments will only be listed in the syllabus and never brought up in class.

Check and double check everything you write for essays. If your allowed opinion based(usually arts and some literature classes) then just make sure everything makes sense. If you need sources (science reports), please learn how to academically write.

You will spend thousands to be here, but you will be expected to pay out of pocket to print 90% of anything you need printed, including notes, project, reports, and more.

Everyone is pretentious and completely full of themselves. Avoid who you can, be courteous to those you cannot avoid.

Splurge on pens because the last thing you need is for your pen to quit working in the middle of lecture. Don’t share pens for anything.

You will think you are starving. You are not. Eat only meals 3 times a day and 2 snacks a day between major classes.

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Witchcraft: horticulture for the black thumb…

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Are you like me and kill every plant you come in contact with?

Tried literally everything from fake plants to cacti?

I am honestly the worst at plants. I think it’s because for most of us that grew up with pets of some sort, it’s easier to care for pets than it is plants. Pets move and will engage with you when they are hungry. Plants just sit there, converting carbon dioxide into oxygen.

So of course, I’m trying out growing plants once again to see if maybe as I’ve aged, I’ve gotten more proficient at caring for plants.

I can already see some of you going, ‘what does this have to do with witchcraft?’

So let me explain. Many parts of spell work rely on plants in one form or another. Some call for specifically grown plants that you ‘should’ have in your garden. So what do I do since I am 1) a poor college kid and 2) a minimum retail worker and 3) closeted witch?

I of course buy all my herbs dried from the seasoning section at the grocery store. Not only would I know that herb plants would die in my care, but I also know that the region I live in is very harsh on many nonnative plant species and those plants require a lot of dedication and attention. So if you’re a stay at home parent or retired, then go for the multitudes of plants all around your house.

Another issue I have is space and funds. I can’t afford to buy the things I need for plants and I have even more limited space for plants. Not to mention that any plants I bring into my house have to be both cat and dog friendly.

So what about my other witchlings out there with blackthumbs like yours truly? What advice would I give you, one beginner to another?

If you want to give growing your own plants a go, just take a few things into consideration; pets, plants, place and space. As in…

  • Do you have any pets that may have an adverse reaction to certain plants?
  • What plants are you specifically trying to grow yourself and do you have the skill needed to care for them?
  • Does the place you live have special requirements for growing season (how dry is it, how wet is it, will the plants need to be potted, is it too sunny, is it not sunny enough…)
  • Do you have enough space for that plant, whether in your apartment window box or your garden or your dorm room desk?

And for those like me who know that plants would be a bit of a waste of money and energy, what should you do?

I buy my herbs when I have some spare change, and if I have to, I’ll get the fresh stuff from the produce section. But honestly, most spell work is about intention alone. So if you can’t afford fresh cinnamon sticks harvested straight from the garden, then just use some off brand ground cinnamon you have in your spice rack.

Witchcraft is all about finding what works for you. If this means that maybe you have to cut corners to work within your limited budget (like me) then make sure you’re just not shortchanging yourself. Be thrifty with your spices but not your intention. And above all, if it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.

And if you want to give indoor plants a go, there are tons of websites and blogs out there that have listed hearty houseplants that can stand up to a shitty plant parent.

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Tarot: Questions to ask at a reading…

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This is probably the most important step when consulting a deck.

What the hell do I ask?

First things first, are you asking for yourself, or are you reading for someone?

I think the easiest way to determine what questions you can or cannot (more like shouldn’t) ask is based off of what kind of reading is happening?

If you are the one doing the reading, then I would say, you can ask any question TO YOUR OWN DECK THAT YOU ARE READING FROM IF YOU ARE READING FOR YOURSELF.

If you’re the reader and asking for a client or someone else, then ask only questions you are comfortable asking.

Think of Tarot like a spiritual Google. You can ask Google whatever you want. However, there are some things you won’t get any answers for (like winning lotto numbers or when you’ll die). There are some things you don’t want to know from Google (like cheaters and such). So how do you know what kind of questions to ask then?

Easy. Ask questions about…

  • where is my career headed
  • is my life balanced between family and aspirations
  • what needs to happen from me for a certain result
  • what am I not seeing about a situation
  • what aspect am I not seeing in this relationship (can be romantic, familial, or platonic)
  • what do I need to move on from
  • yes or no questions (not in depth answers but easy enough to read)
  • where is my life going
  • what options should I consider
  • out of my options which is better
  • what do I need to focus on in my life
  • is this option a good option for me

The most important thing about a Tarot reading is that you’re not trying to get all the answers to the universe. You’re working on getting answers about yourself.

Remember that some things are left up to chance and shouldn’t be rushed. If you’re worried about meeting someone or if your wife is going to leave you or if you’re going to lose your job, should you really be getting a Tarot reading instead of fixing the problems you already know about?

Gripes and Groans, student life

Student life: Rewriting your notes…

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So how do I study and stay on top of my busy schedule?

Most of the time, I don’t.

But what do I do when I try to study between working, commuting, and trying not to lose my shit?

I recopy my lecture notes. My handwriting is absolutely atrocious. So when I find the time, I sit down with a fresh notebook page and copy my notes down and make them readable. Then when I get time to study, I can review everything that the professor went over in lecture.

So how do I rewrite my notes to make sure all the viable content gets copied down?

First, I start with opening the lecture from the day and start writing the notes I copied down. Whenever I hit a snag from where my writing is indecipherable, I can reference the lecture slides and jog my memory.

So how do my reference notes and lecture notes differ?

In my refernce notes, I use different colors to help with memorization. For example…

  • Red is used for vocab words
  • Green is used to key concepts (either underlined or written in green ink)
  • Blue is used for chapter headings and to distinguish what will be on what test
  • Pink/purple (or another bright color) is used for chapter summaries and to summarize what will be on the test

Does this system really work? Maybe. I’ve heard many conflicting things on this way to study or that way to study. Honestly, this method helps me and that’s what counts. Maybe your method you develop involves making flashcards, or watching Crash Course videos or whatever.

There’s no right way to do anything and whatever works for you is what works.

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Tarot 101: Two of Swords…

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The Two of Swords is an interesting card. In Tarot, twos are used to represent choices and decisions. Swords, for me, represent fire and thoughts.

Two of Swords

So what can we see in the Two of Swords? A woman sits on a bench, blindfolded. Behind her is a sea or a very large lake, maybe. It is night time. She holds two swords upright. These are very large swords, as they extend past the border. She holds these very large swords easily.

So what does it mean? The blindfold reminds me of Lady Justice, who is blind but finds the truth. So she must being trying to find the truth or find an answer. Both swords like similar in size, color, and heft. If this card represents decisions, then the swords are the decisions or choices themselves, and they are similar choices.

But we have to remember that the setting is still night time. So perhaps these choices are not about the easy things in life, maybe these choices are more difficult.

Two of Swords Reversed

So what about when this card comes up reversed? The moon looks like it is just rising at this point, so maybe this is still about difficult choices, but it is the start of difficult choices. Both choices are still equally aloft, so both choices, while difficult, are both viable options.

Depending on the reading and the question asked, this card can mean weighing options carefully and determining whether the choices are equal or whether the choices available are difficult choices.

So when this card is pulled, remember the basics.

  • Twos represent decisions
  • Swords represent fire (air in conventional interpretation) and thoughts
  • In reference to time ,Swords refer to days (fire) or weeks (air)

Tarot Reading – 1 Card

A one card Tarot reading. Answers yes/no questions.

$1.00

bitchcraft, Grimoire, Witchy

Intro to Witchcraft: Incense…

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God I love incense.

I feel like incense is one of those things that every witch loves passionately and lately, it’s been getting a bad wrap from those moms. You know, the ‘Gregory doesn’t need vaccinations, I have essential oils and gluten-free pasta’ moms.

But for witches, incense is like… my jam.

Incense is used to bring fire into a spell or ritual, safely (cause you can’t logistically have a bonfire in your living room). Then, the fact that each scent has it’s own alignments.

Like, every one secretly loves incense and lighting shit on fire. It’s something in our primal caveman brain.

So what do you need to get started with incense?

Nowadays, most stores are carrying incense (for those Karens out there).

So you can trek down to local grocery and pick up some sticks and light up.

Here are some of my go-to flavors I love to have around the house.

  • Lavender – I mean, duh. Any witch worth their salt keeps some lavender around the house in one form or another. Incense is one of the easiest form to keep around and light up when you need it. Lavender is used for promoting peace and calming, whether through aromatherapy or through potions (i.e. some Celestial Seasonings Lemon Lavender Lane tea, which is also my jam).
  • Sage – While not a traditional sage bundle, I keep a couple sticks around to help with quick, on-the-go cleanings. Like, when I need to sequester myself away and recharge, I can sit in my office space and light up some sage, and create a space just for me to recharge my energy.
  • Lemon – I just really love citrus. Citrus, especially lemon and orange, always makes me feel like something is clean and fresh and bright. Lemon incense is good for luck and success.

Now a few things you have to know about incense.

You can’t just light it up like a blunt and start smoking.

Okay, you can, but you need a little something extra.

Just like with candles, you have to watch incense around small children and animals, and you should never leave it unattended for extended periods of time (if you have to leave for a moment to get your cup of coffee, then cool, but don’t light it then go out partying with your friends all night).

If you do have to leave (emergencies happen, no biggie) then make sure to put out your incense. You can put it out by dunking the tip in water, wetting your fingertips and squeezing the tip (like an old-timey candle), or mashing the tip, like a cigarette butt, into an ash tray or the incense holder ash groove.

Lavender and cats don’t mix. If you have cats and want to burn some lavender incense, just be aware they cannot breakdown certain aspects of lavender and it can cause moderate health issues, like nausea and vomiting. When I want to burn lavender incense, I seclude myself in my office away from my cats and my cats’ food with an open window and the fan on. I make sure the room is completely clear of smoke before allowing them back into the room.

There’s no right way to pick incense. Of course, there’s some traditional flavors everybody swears by, but honestly, if a certain scent gives you a headache or brings bad memories to mind (cinnamon is my bane, if you know what I mean), then don’t try to make it work. There are always alternatives you can use, and you can always tweak a spell to work for you. Maybe lemon doesn’t bring to mind wealth, but pine does (you know, pine trees are green, money is green), then focus on the intent instead of the community.

So here’s a quick breakdown of the most common incense flavors.

FlavorAlignmentUses (rituals, rites, and spells)
AmberFire and Airwisdom, truth, love and desire
Cinnamonpersonal power, protection,
inflaming passion,
countering love spells
CitrusLemon for confidence, good luck and
goal accomplishment
Orange for joy, good fortune, prosperity,
and marriage happiness
Dragon’s
Blood		FireThe coffee of incense: because of the
rarity and power, it adds a kick
to any spell work, esp. useful in love
magic, protection, and oath-making
Evergreenwisdom, cleansing,
protection, money magic
FrankincenseThe stand -in: because of the commonality
works for most spell work, including
setting sacred space, offerings, and
purification
HoneyIdeal for works for drawing prosperity
wealth, and luxury
JasmineThe MoonFor New moon and Full Moon rituals,
encourages prophetic dreams and
spiritual magic
Lavendercleansing for the home, body and mind
useful for healing and meditation
Patchouliattraction magic, like money spells
Raincleansing, healing, relaxation,
esp. good for ‘clean slates/fresh starts’
and calming anger
(Fresh Linen scent can be used in a pinch)
RoseVenuslove incense: attracting and keeping love, usher in romance and self-love,
can also open the heart
Sandalwoodonly for benevolent works; cannot be used
to curse or compel, used to consecrate, heal,
removing negativity, , bringing peace,
wishes, bless altars and ritual spaces
Vanillacalming an area, promoting mental and
physical arousal, stimulate good luck
happiness, prosperity, and knowledge-seeking

Incense is a great way to jump feet-first into witchcraft. It’s pretty affordable, and even if you spend too much at first, there’s no way you’ll burn through 50 sticks of incense super fast.

Gripes and Groans, Marriage

Getting married on a budget…

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I can’t understand why people get so stressed over planning a wedding.

Why would you want to spend thousands and thousands on a wedding?

My two budget tips for planning your own wedding?

  1. Don’t bother having anybody come. It’ll cut down on how much money you ave to spend on food, entertainment, etc.
  2. Don’t hire a wedding planner. Do you really want a big wedding? Do you really want to invite your entire family and spend hundreds on clothes and food and booze?

Seriously, weddings are a waste of money. There’s no reason to spend thousands and thousands on giant party that acts as nothing more than a status symbol.

Spend that money on something else. Save up for a down payment on a house for you and your new spouse. Spend that money on a well-deserved vacation/honeymoon.

Don’t buy into the idea that you need to do this or that for your relationship to be seen as a ‘real’ relationship.

Gripes and Groans, student life, Work

Working retail: hitting your breaking point…

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My breaking point at work has definitely been when I told my manager I had to back off my hours to focus on school and he bitched at me and tried to change my mind.

Now, I’ve talked about a lot of the bullshit I’ve been through at work, from being threatened by fellow associates, being hit on by coworkers and customers alike, being pushed to the point of working 12 hour days alone to meet unrealistic deadlines, but this… This is the straw that broke this camel’s back.

I try my best to communicate with my managers about what may be happening in my personal life that can affect my work life. I try my best to work with my managers so they are not left high and dry during rushes and busy days. But this incident…

I will not allow someone to stand in the way of my future. I will not allow someone to look at me like I don’t do enough as is for my team and bitch at me about it.

To give you some perspective about this entire situation, I am not the only person going to school right now on my team. 2 other people are and honestly, I feel I work harder than them. One team member only works 4 days a week, and not even weekend days, just a regular Monday through Thursday schedule. The other teammate works 2-3 days a week and only 6 hours per day. And me? I work 5 days a week, especially weekend days and rack up about 38 hours a week.

But I get bitched at because I had to back down from 40 hours a week. I get bitched at because I’ve only been on the team for 3 months and have already been asked to be evening shift lead after the managers leave and I have to take the angry customers and angry calls. But I’m the one letting the entire store down.

So what am I going to do about it?

Honestly… I don’t know yet. I wish I could find another job, but I won’t be able to find anything where I can retain the hours and pay rate I need to stay in school and pay my bills.

So I’m stuck. And stuck griping on the internet because I need to work hard to live and everyone wants to bitch about it.

So thanks for coming to my bitchfest, leave a comment about how idiotic and ridiculous I am.

bitchcraft, Witchy

Witchcraft: learning about the zodiac…

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The zodiac has been really popular in meme culture of late. So your friends probably already forced you into looking into your sun sign.

But now you’re getting deeper down the witchcraft rabbit-hole, and you are getting left, right, and center about rising signs, your venus, houses, mars, ascendant…

Honestly, it really is a lot to take in. So take a deep breath.

First thing first, ask yourself if the zodiac is something you really want to learn about. If you don’t feel you’re a celestial witch, then don’t really bother. It’s like knowing your Hogwarts house. If you’re not a die-hard Harry Potter fan (and honestly, we all love the series but we’re not all die-hard), then you don’t need to know all the ins and outs of your Hogwarts house. Same goes for the zodiac. Maybe just pick up just enough to know yourself, but you don’t need to go in depth and learn something you have no passion about.

So let’s say you do want to learn anything and everything about the zodiac.

Then you need to decide what you want to start with. Which zodiac are you going to go with? The traditional zodiac (Aries-Capricorn), or maybe you want to learn more about the Chinese zodiac, or maybe your culture has some aspect of the zodiac you want to learn about.

Once you decide your focus, my only advice is start small.

Ignore all the memes you’ve seen floating around and dive deep into the internet for research. Learn about the differences between the signs, then learn about what moon signs are, then move on to the rising/ascendant signs, then the houses, until you can understand what a whole birth chart means.

So what do the basics mean?

Sun sign is the position the sun was in when you were born. It’s mostly described as the You of your self. Which makes no sense. I think of the sun sign as the canvas your entire personality is painted on. Each canvas is a little different, but each canvas has unique characteristics.

Moon sign is the position the moon was in when you were born. It’s been described as the emotional side of your personality. Keeping with our painting allegory, the moon sign is the middle ground of the painting. It’s what helps set up the painting and gives it some character . Like the landscape.

Then your rising sign (also called the ascendant) is the way you make a first impression on others. To me, it’s the detail in the foreground that draws your attention for the first time in someone else’s painting.

So what are the rest of the signs in your birth chart? Honestly, I never bothered to learn. They’re the little background details that fill out the painting and give it life. Sometimes it’s better to just better to appreciate the picture than dissect it.

So each sign corresponds to certain elements, fixtures, and colors. Out of teh twelve signs, each correspond into different categories.

Aries, Leo, and Sagittarius are Fire signs.

Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius are Air signs.

Scorpio, Pisces, and Cancer are Water signs.

Capricorn, Taurus, and Virgo are Earth signs.

Each sign corresponds to different colors and characteristics.

So go forth and learn. Figure out who you are first if you’re interested in this.

Let me know in the comments what your zodiac sign(s) are. Personally, I’m a Leo sun, Sagittarius moon, and Aries rising,

bitchcraft, Witchy

Witchcraft: 5 things every new witch needs…

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As a new witch, sometimes called a witchling or in the new hip kid phrases, a noob, I get to ingest all the good advice I get from everyone who’s been doing this a whole lot longer than me.

But if I had to give some advice myself?

There’s seriously only a couple items you need to really start practicing witchcraft.

  1. A couple of good playlists
  2. A good pair of shoes for walking in
  3. Passion
  4. A notebook
  5. Access to the internet

You don’t really need any of the fancy crystals or incense or candles to start practicing witchcraft.

Part of being a witch is learning about those who came before you and what they learned. It’s about teaching and growing and learning about yourself.

So let’s break this down.

1. Playlists

So why are playlists important? Music is incredibly important in every aspect of life; movies alone need soundtracks, let alone every aspect of life that needs music. Weddings, graduations, parties, funerals… Not to mention the pychology behind music and the way it helps your brain work.

So set up some playlists to help you get in the witchy mood. Playlists for meditating, happy playlists to help you manifest, hardcore playlist to help you banish, sad playlists to help you do shadow work, playlists for anything in between. Whatever pumps you up, or fills you with some emotion, put it in a playlist.

And the best part, playlists are basically free. Depending on what streaming service you use, it’s a relatively cheap option to help get started with your witchy journey.

2. A good pair of shoes

Why do you need a good pair of walking shoes? What could possibly be the point in a pair of shoes? Well, you need to ground yourself.

You’re thinking, okay sure, ‘ground’ myself. Haha. But seriously.

A good pair of shoes will take you on your journey, whether it’s a walkabout cross-country to find yourself, or a walk to the park to enjoy the sunshine before a thunderstorm.

Grounding is the simplest witchcraft you can do. I’ll post about grounding later.

3. Passion

This one is actually free. It takes just yourself. You need passion, in some way, for witchcraft. Maybe its a passion to learn about everything you can. Maybe its a passion to find a group of like-minded individuals. Maybe its just a passion to discover yourself. Maybe its passion to heal yourself in ways that modern medicine hasn’t quite discovered yet (I wholey endorse medical professionals for fixing physical illnesses, but we just haven’t found a cure for things like PTSD and depression).

Passion is what drives you down this path. If your passion is just to learn about this aspect of your culture, and find out why women were victimized for this lifestyle, then there you go, there’s your drive.

But take heed, this path isn’t for the fainthearted. It’s a path that will push you to see yourself and your place in the universe. But that’s why passion is important. You can turn away from this path at anytime, after you’ve found your answers. But your passion will keep you moving, keep you growing.

4. A notebook

This one is a gimme. I mean, come on. Why else do you keep notebooks around? That’s right, FOR NOTES!

Modern witches use notebooks all the time for their grimoires (aka the Book of Shadows or BOS). And as soon as you start taking notes, bam, you started your own Book of Shadows.

Witches take notes about their deities, their practice, their spells, and all sorts of information they find. They use their BOS for journaling, notes, sigil drawing practice, planners, etc.

A notebook of your choosing is the prefect way to get started. Just grab a $1 notebook from the local store, maybe a pack of pens (if you’re anything like me and lose yours all the damn time), and get started.

Take notes on cryptids from your area and culture, deities you follow or are fascinated with, colors and candles, sigils you find interesting, playlists you’ll make someday when you quit forgetting to actually make them, moon phases, notes on spellwork, etc, etc.

5. Internet access

This one also is a gimme. If you can access the internet, you can access the entire world of witchcraft (as well as World of Warcraft, which is completely different but also available online). You have access to all of the information available from different bloggers, different cultures, even actual books that have been digitized in archives.

The internet is your garden you can harvest information from. Back in the olden days, witches would form their covens to exchange information with one another about spellwork, sigils, and spiritwork (ya know, the whole dancing naked in the woods bullshit the pilgrims demonized, literally). But today, with the amazing interconnectedness of the world, you can log on to any social media platform and see people who have been doing this for years and people, like me, who are brand new and sharing their own journey. You can get the information you need from all across the world and learn everything.

You can still form a coven or join one if you want, and the internet has created such a wonderful platform for exchanging information with one another. Of course, you have to be careful about that information; sometimes people purposefully mislead or misrepresent information. So do your research and make up your mind about what information is relevant and what doesn’t apply to you.

For example, one area of debate within witchcraft is hexing. Some witches disagree with hexing, while some agree with the practice. So do your research, hear both sides of the argument, then decide what you believe in.

Witchcraft is a complex system. So don’t feel disheartened if you don’t know which way to go. There’s so much to unpack and learn about. That’s why it’s a learning process. Everyone out there will give advice and opinions galore about how to practice and what to learn about.

Maybe you feel a little late to this party and you didn’t bring any chips or dip. It’s okay. The party has been going on for years now and half the party goers will be happy you showed up (even if the half are mad you showed up without more salsa). And by years, I mean like hundreds of years.

So find your groove, your niche, and live.

Gripes and Groans, student life, Work

Spite not sugar…

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Remember when you were having a hard time in elementary school with someone and you would ask your parents for help and they would say ‘kill them with kindness?’

And remember how frustrated you were because Stacy was not going to be nice to you first and why should you be nice first to some dumb slide-hog? And you would moan ‘but mom, killing her with kindness isn’t going to work!’ And you were right, because your mom had never met Stacy or knew what a raging cold-hearted bitch she was.

But then as you grew up, it was still the same advice of ‘kill them with kindness’. Well, do I have news for you friends.

You can now cut them from your life spitefully and still live a great life.

But that’s not the only place I’m going with Spite. Spite is what makes the world go round, not kindness. You don’t see drug lords and politicians being nice to regular people 9 times out of 10. You don’t see your managers at work being completely nice to everyone.

Maybe you’re afraid to take that leap into being a bitter hag like me. So let me tell you a thing; hate is just as passionate as love. You get as much emotional energy from hating something as you do loving something. So why not live in spite of everything?

When you harness spite as an emotional energy source, you feel more motivated to get shit done just so you don’t have to do it again. You feel more pressure from yourself to get that stupid meeting over with or to finish up that dumb project with so-and-so.

I live in spite of my foundations. I decided that I hated how I grew up and the foundations my family provided so I decided I was going to turn that hate into something productive. When I finally finish school, I’ll be the first doctor in my entire family. The first.

To hell with all the bullshit ‘good vibes only’ and ‘thinking positive’. I’m positive I’m going to get further than half of those wackos who only want to be positive and I’m positive I’ll have better emotional health because I’m not trying to push aside my negative thoughts or my ‘bad’ emotions.

I want you all to give me an example of how killing with kindness has worked for you, because in all my life and all my experiences I’ve never seen it work. So comment below and tell me why I’m wrong.

Gripes and Groans, Uncategorized

Long time no see…

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Sorry kiddos. I’ve been working like crazy and haven’t taken the right time to keep on top of the blog bs.

My summer semester started on Monday so I’ve running around crazy between commuting an hour each way for classes, working 40 hours a week still and having to manage some home issues (broken pipes and all that jazz).

So I’m going to work better at updating and making sure I don’t fall off the radar entirely. Like I have for the last month or so.

bitchcraft, Witchy

Tarot 101: Ace of Swords…

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The Ace of Swords start the last suit of the Tarot. Coinciding with spades, Swords represent thought and wind in Tarot. Connecting back to my previous post Ace of Wands, there’s a bit of confusion about common school of thought and some of the newer interpretations regarding how Wands and Swords represent elements of the Tarot.

Personally, I feel that Swords are connected to fire, but the common depictions in the Rider-Waite deck do have the feeling of Swords connecting to thoughts and the mind. So my interpretations may be a little off, but oh well.

Ace of Swords

In the Ace of Swords, we can see a sword, held above a mountainous terrain, ringed with a golden crown. So what can we divine from this? Well, Swords are connected with thought, and the crown sits on the head. Aces are beginnings. Perhaps the Ace of Swords is eluding to a new thought, or maybe a new mentality.

Ace of Swords Reversed

So what can we see from the Ace of Swords Reversed? Well, obviously, the sword is now upside down, like the sword is to be sheathed. Perhaps this is signifying the end of a mentality, or that certain thoughts need to be ‘sheathed’.

This card may come up with questions regarding what actions someone may be thinking of taking, or why certain situations may be coming up. So what about when it comes up for other questions? Remember the basics:

  • Aces signify new beginnings and new journeys
  • Swords coincide with fire (in my book) or wind (conventional thinking) and thoughts
  • In reference to time, Swords refer to day (fire burns very quickly, like a match) or weeks (air flows quickly) depending on which school of thought you subscribe to
bitchcraft, Witchy

Tarot: April Spread…

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March has been a busy month for me so I decided to start doing monthly draws before the new month to see what I should maybe keep my eye open for, whether in ways I can change or factors I should pay more attention to.

Since this is the first spread I’ve gone over, I’m going to go over some of the basics of how I set up a spread, how I shuffle, and how to read a spread.

First things first, how do I shuffle my deck? I have small, dainty hands, which makes holding the cards difficult during shuffling, because the Tarot cards are so much larger than a normal deck of cards. So of course, I took to google and forums galore to find if there’s something I can do. The answer?

Do whatever feels comfortable to you. There’s no wrong way to do it. I’ll go into depth later on how to shuffle and all the ways you can read from just shuffling.

So what kind of spread am I using? It’s one of my own making. It’s a 4 by 3 spread. The rows represent the weeks and the columns represent 1) an overview of the week, 2) what to watch out for that week, and 3) what to look forward to each week.

Monthly Tarot Spread – April
Monthly Spread – April, revealed

So what does week one hold for April? The weekly overview is represented by the King of Pentacles. Since he is the top of the pentacle suit, he is in charge of the kingdom of wealth. Therefore he represents responsibility. Knowing that payday is this week, I can see why this card came up to be responsible with my wealth.

Week 1 April Monthly Spread

What should I watch out for this week? The Page of Pentacles comes up, which represents youth and materialism. Perhaps this means to watch out for frivolous spending or immature money handling.

What should I look forward to for the first week of April? The Ace of Swords comes up, and knowing the Swords represent thoughts and aces are new journeys, I think it means that I should keep my mind open this week to new thoughts and new focus.

Week 2 April Monthly Spread

Week 2 represented by the Knight of Pentacles. The Knight watches over the land of wealth, so this may be a warning to be cautious over the wealth I got in the first week of April.

What should I look out for in the second week of April? The Ten of Pentacles represents material wealth and fulfillment. Perhaps this means I should keep an eye open for easy money or maybe I’ll need to keep my eyes open for wealth coming my way.

What should I look forward to? The Chariot is a warrioress seated in a chariot pulled by two Sphinx. She represents victory. So I should look forward to victory in my life. Maybe a course of action will work out at work, or perhaps I will conquer old habits (from week 1’s reminder to keep an open mind).

Week 3 April Monthly Spread

Week 3 is represented by the Seven of Swords. The Seven of Swords represents strategy, and deception. Knowing that the third week of April prefaces Easter Sunday and that work will be very hectic, this makes sense that I’ll have to use strategy to complete my work for the week. But the deception? Only I know what I’m withholding ;).

What I should keep my eye out for is represented by the Ace of Pentacles. This represents new money or new wealth. Again, I have a feeling this is a forewarning of easy money or an easy money opportunity coming my way.

So what’s should I look forward to this week? The Six of Cups represents channeling your inner child and nostalgia. Maybe this means I’ll get to do something I haven’t done in years or walk down memory lane.

Week 4 April Monthly Spread

The fourth week of April is represented by the Three of Cups. The Three of Cups represents friendships and celebrations. Since Easter occurs this week, that makes sense, since I’ll mostly be seeing my friends from work as we all work on Easter Sunday.

What should I look out for this week? The Six of Wands represents victory and celebration. Maybe my victory from the third week will come back to bite me? Or maybe I’ll have a seemingly easy victory over something this week?

And finally, what can I look forward to the last week of April? The Hermit comes up. This card represents pretty much what it is; the Hermit represents solitude. So maybe I’ll get some much needed R&R this week before I start ramping up for my summer semester at school.

Want a reading yourself? Hit me up via my contact page. I can read your day, week or month.

student life

How to: make a relationship work through a full schedule…

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I get this all the time when I tell people how full my schedule is with school and work. They all get this shocked little look and kind of stammer ‘wow, do you have any time for your boyfriend?’ And I want to slap them all each and every time they say some variation of that.

You want to know why?

Because my boyfriend is not a choice-maker in my life.

Even if he were my husband and all of our financial accounts were shared, he still wouldn’t be the decision maker. Because it is my life.

I understand these concerned people are more-so just because I do have a packed schedule and they’re trying to comprehend how I handle it all.

But how do I handle it? How do I handle being in school full-time, working full-time, studying full-time? By being a complete and udder dickhead.

I literally had to cancel every plan with my family over the summer. Seriously. In my family group chat last night, I had to tell everyone that I was too busy with school to come camping at all this summer.

I told my boyfriend that I’m going to have dedicated study hours and that I cannot break them. I also told him to figure out the 5 days he wants to see me all summer so I can use the only vacation days I have to see him for half the day instead of studying.

And when fall semester rolls around… I don’t know yet.

But managing a relationship inside or outside of school… That’s easy. Everyone makes it seem likes it’s hard, but so many couples (especially straight couples) forget about communication and commitment in a relationship. They forget that a relationship is a commitment you make ahead of time and that you have to make time and sacrifices for it, for those people.

So what are some tips I have to make a relationship last during hectic semesters?

  1. Have nights out with your SO every so often. Catch dinner and a movie and just talk. Not everything has to be about sex, not everything has to be about being a perfect couple. Just connect as friends would.
  2. Communicate as mush as you can what your school commitments are. Don’t blindside your SO when you have to cancel date night because a project group is running late. Communicate everything ahead of time, like what your week is going to look like and what your workload is going to look like. Let them know when your study hours are so they won’t be disturbing you during crunch time.
  3. Think of them as your break every week from studying. Maybe you facetime, or actually call each other, or it’s your date night once a week. But make time for them once a week as a reward for making it through another grueling week.

Does this always work? No, hell no. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for over three years and doing work and school in between all that. We’ve fought and screamed and had our bad days. Just like anyone. But we’ve worked through them.

So is there any way to really make it all work perfectly? No, and anyone who says otherwise is lying. Or trying to sell you something. Just TRY to make it work as good as you can. That’s all you can do.